I feel so abused and so lost, all because of you. Never in my life have I met someone so confusing and so determined to make me feel inferior and less of a human being. Tonight I had the occasion to see that you'll never change and that, no matter how many times I try or what I do, there is no chance for us. I randomly see you on the street and you, out of fear or shame (I wish I knew), shove your friend in my face, like I might jump at you or god knows what. I felt small and insignificant and that was a clear reflection of the last three+ years. I probably wasted so much time, much more than needed, but oh well. Call me a sucker for every time I forgave all the little things, for every memory I now treasure.
Blood, sweat, tears. My life, soul and heart. All for you and you never saw it. And once again I thought you might have noticed me, but such a fool I was. If I could, I'd laugh. But I can't, which makes this even more pathetic than it should be.
True goodbyes are the ones never said or explained.
So true, so...goodbye.
Last boyfriend rant. I thought about not writing it, but I seem to function better once my frustration is on paper/screen. And what I felt like anger turned out to be an endless pit of sadness, much to my disappointment. Four days until London and I have too many feelings to sort out, which makes it impossible to concentrate on this particular one. Good, bad? I don't know. All I know is I'm disappointed, and that's one thing I can't fight with.
P.S. A "Dear John" letter is...well, read below.
Source: credit!
And song, song, song.
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